How do you feel about the words purity and reverence?

Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight. 1 Peter 3:1-4

As a child of the seventies, I have to tell you up front that I am not fond of the words purity or reverence. The world we live in does not consider these virtues today like they were considered when these words were written. But God finds them important enough to have them written for me, a former feminist hippie-type, to find in the 21^st century. I can’t just gloss over them or avoid them. If I am going to follow Christ, I have to BE them! That’s going to take some significant understanding, so I started with my good friend Webster. His definition for pure has four entries, but for our purposes, I chose three definitions that I can learn, live with every day, and most important, demonstrate.

Webster says that “purity is the state of being pure.”

Pure is:

1 – free from harshness or roughness and being in tune (like a musical instrument)

2 – a) free from what vitiates, weakens, or pollutes; b) containing nothing that does not properly belong; c) free from moral fault or guilt; d) marked by chastity

3 – having exactly the talents or skills needed for a particular role

I want to be in tune with my husband. I don’t want to make my husband ineffective (vitiate), weaken him or pollute him. I don’t want to hold onto anything that does not belong in our marriage. I don’t want to be morally responsible or guilty for anything I do in this or any other relationship. I want to be equipped for my role as the best wife for my husband. In all those definitions, I want purity. I truly want to be in “the state of being pure.”

Webster’s definition of reverence:

Reverence: honor or respect felt or shown : DEFERENCE; especially : profound adoring, awed respect

Reverence is a bit easier for me. Remember the first commercials for the Datsun 240Z? That’s when the word “awesome” was re-introduced in pop culture. Since then we have built a culture around the word “AWESOME!” that resonates reverence. I really do love my husband and want to adore him. Why would I want to do that? Does he deserve it? Probably not, at least not all the time. But I want to revere and respect my husband--make him feel like he is awesome--because it is “of great worth in God’s sight.”

Even at the times when he is least adorable, I want to show him my respect and honor. I just remember how Nancy Reagan looked up at her husband, Ronnie, our 40^th President of the United States. She revered him. I think her obvious reverence fed the love between them. I want that in my marriage too, so I will practice reverence.

If your husband is in one of those “least adorable” stages, ask God to show you how to respect and revere your husband as you seek to honor God in your respect for your husband. Ask God to allow you to see the good in your husband as God himself sees the good. Maybe it is in the way he analyzes a situation, plans his spending or saving, sometimes it is the way he smiles, sometimes it is his patience, but there is always good because God has created your husband in His own image. Make a commitment to a pure and reverent lifestyle because it is of great worth in God’s sight. Don't be surprise if God changes things!